What Moms Really Want for Mother’s Day
So, I am a mom, and I think the idea of honoring mothers (and fathers) once a year is a fabulous concept. But I must ask, where did the “floral kitsch” concept of what mothers want come from? From rose-clad teacups to offensively scented candles to sculptures of angels holding lilies – we don’t like these things most days, so why on Mother’s Day? (Please forgive me if you collect teacups.) The truth of the matter is, we could populate a solid garage sale with our Mother’s Day gifts if we didn’t love you so much that we keep the little gems (in the back of our closets).
The truth of the matter is, we could populate a solid garage sale with our Mother’s Day gifts if we didn’t love you so much that we keep the little gems.Before I tell you what Moms really want, here is my grace-filled caveat: I am not meaning to sound selfish. We love it when our little ones use their own minds to guess what we want. We love it when they print their little hands on craft paper next to a sappy poem. We really do. But, this is where Dads come in. Dads can help shape the process. After all, until the kids are at least ten, they can’t do this thing alone. We’ll return the favor on Father’s Day.
So, here goes: My Top Five Things Mothers Really Want for Mother’s Day:
1. We want you to recognize who we are and what we value most. For some, this may mean cooking a nice dinner and cleaning up afterward. For some, this will mean a bouquet of nice flowers (please, no carnations or baby’s breath). Most of all, we want you to recognize us: personality, gifts, desires – specifically and not Hallmark-generically.
2. We want to spend time with you. Back to cooking that nice dinner. We would love to sit down and actually eat it with you – all together – around the table. No one has a phone. No one gets up to eat in the other room. And, hopefully, toddlers eat all their vegetables (but I recognize this is could be an unreasonable request).
3. We want to spend time away from you. And yes, sometimes Mother’s Day is about letting go of our motherly duties. We’d love a massage or a pedicure, or a day out with friends, or simply a day in – alone. Most of all, we really value time to breathe.
4. We need a reminder: Sometimes we need a reminder that we are not in this thing alone. We are stewarding little minds and hearts that really belong to our Creator, and He is the one we continually surrender our children to – thank goodness! We need not bear burdens of guilt or fear as mothers.
5. We really do want your hands stamped on craft paper with a sappy poem. And we promise, promise, promise, it will never end up in the recycling bin or the garage sale pile.
Shannon Steed Sigler is a community artist, curator, and theologian. She also serves as the Director of Social Media Communications for BeADisciple.com. Shannon is the mother of a creative four-year-old and the wife of a liturgical scholar. Her own work and research center around a Wesleyan paradigm for the visual arts. Visit her website here.